Monday, May 07, 2007

What a Long, Strange Trip It's Been.

Bill Kreutzmann is 61 years old today. He was the Grateful Dead's drummer for their entire career – Wikipedia points out that he is one of four people who played each and every Dead gig, starting just before his 19th birthday.

Was it fun, Bill? Oh, tell me how much fun it was. Tell me all about what it was like, when all the doors were open.

Tell me about traveling all over, the adventure. Tell about inventing a whole new world at a time when you could do that, when lots of other people also believed you could do that. Tell me all about it, Bill; make me feel like I was there too.

Tell me what you think when you remember the beginning. Tell me in words so vivid it takes me back like a time machine to a place I never saw, but that I need so badly to believe was there at least once. Some people say that it was a time when people forgot their duty, their responsibility to each other, that it was the start of a long downhill slide rather than the last bright chance I want to think it was. Which is it, Bill? Take me back there and let me stay for awhile until I can breathe easy again.

There are days now when it feels like the world gets more constricted with every minute that goes by. They say that back then, there were more and more possibilities opening wherever you went, and with a little care you could live a life where every moment was a brand new start.

My daily round gets more and more repetitive as time goes by, Bill. I'm getting old twice as fast as the calendar would seem to show. Tell me what it was like for you and the people who lived it with you. Tell me what it was like to watch the time going by.

Oh, Bill, somehow or another we blew it. It's a frightened and frightening world now. Did you see it happen? Can you explain it? Did you look out at the audience one night and realize that you and the guys had stopped being an inspiration and started being a haven? Did it make you angry? Are you still angry at us?

If you can help me, even if it's just for a while, I think I can manage the rest of it. I think I can live my life in this overheated, angry, frightened world, full of struggle and pain, if you can show me there once was another world building, even if someone tore it down unfinished because it was too beautiful to live.

Bill, you were there. You even helped build it. Do you remember it? Did you know what you were doing? Or did you just play the drums and let it come? Did it just pour out of you and your friends like breath? Do you think it will ever come back? Is it worth waiting for? Or is it just something in the past?

If that's all it is, Bill, please tell me all about it until I can go there myself.

Benshlomo says, with the Grateful Dead - One way or another, this darkness got to give.

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